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Anyone who has “accidentally” flipped through an US Weekly recently—which is to say, everyone—knows they have a few segments so ridiculous they’re begging for parody.

 

Topping the list: “Stars: They’re Just Like Us!” This segment features photos of celebrities doing people stuff like breathing, eating, napping and carrying adopted children named after obscure Ethiopian villages. Then US captions the photo to verify/explain the celebrity is breathing, eating, etc., since it would otherwise be unclear that this person is, in fact, a mammal doing shockingly mundane mammal things. Just like us!

 

So while US is busy fussing over stars who drink from a straw, I’m compiling pictures of other mammals that are just like celebrities. And as a special treat, there will also be an occasional “Fashion Police Police” post that re-captions the inordinately lame comments their staff writers make on bad celebrity outfits.

 

Let me know Who Wears It Best.

 

SAMPLE:

 

They Prefer Soft Lighting!

 

 

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